WEBVTT Kind: captions Language: en 00:00:00.200 --> 00:00:05.240 It’s a perfect night for a candle-lit dinner.  The Cannibal sharpens his filet knife,   00:00:05.240 --> 00:00:11.320 a hungry glint in his eye. It’s been a long week  at work - Seeing clients, managing accounts,   00:00:11.320 --> 00:00:18.520 crunching numbers. Having to pretend he’s like  all the others. That mass of bland, boring cattle. 00:00:18.520 --> 00:00:24.320 But on Friday, he gets to indulge in  his ultimate passion. What a lovely day. 00:00:24.320 --> 00:00:30.400 There’s a quiet, pained murmuring coming from the  larder. The Cannibal ignores it and chops carrots.   00:00:30.400 --> 00:00:36.400 On a cold evening like this, he could lose himself  in a nice, hot soup and a bottle of the red stuff. 00:00:36.400 --> 00:00:41.760 The murmuring in the larder becomes a muffled  scream. How rude. It’s interrupting his favorite   00:00:41.760 --> 00:00:48.320 part of the Thieving Magpie on vinyl. That simply  will not do. He cleans the carrot juice from the   00:00:48.320 --> 00:00:53.960 shimmering blade of the knife and stomps over to  the larder in a fierce mood, his teeth gritted. 00:00:53.960 --> 00:01:00.120 He opens the reinforced door. Strings of garlic  hang next to imported Italian sausage. Preserves   00:01:00.120 --> 00:01:06.800 and pickles line the shelves in jars. So many fine  aged cheese he can’t remember all the names. And,   00:01:06.800 --> 00:01:09.920 of course, Keith, bound and gagged in the corner,   00:01:09.920 --> 00:01:14.920 his ankles chained to the wall. Not  so long ago, Keith was an intern at   00:01:14.920 --> 00:01:22.440 the Cannibal’s firm. He’d underperformed.  He was always late. He was insubordinate. 00:01:22.440 --> 00:01:26.640 Still, the Cannibal is resourceful and  pragmatic. It’s why they pay him such   00:01:26.640 --> 00:01:32.360 a lofty salary. It didn’t take him long  to think of another use for poor Keith. 00:01:32.360 --> 00:01:36.920 As Keith tries to beg through the rope tied  into his mouth, the Cannibal feels a pang of   00:01:36.920 --> 00:01:42.280 hunger. He always gets the most excited when  the cattle are afraid. It gives him a feeling   00:01:42.280 --> 00:01:50.760 of almost godlike power. They’ll cry, they’ll  beg, but sooner or later, the reality sets in. 00:01:50.760 --> 00:01:54.920 They’re less than human now: They’re food. 00:01:54.920 --> 00:01:58.920 Keith, rapidly losing hope, notices an  interesting quirk in the architecture   00:01:58.920 --> 00:02:04.520 of the room. The floors slant slightly down into  the center of the room. There’s a drainage grate.   00:02:04.520 --> 00:02:10.400 The Cannibal notices Keith looking at it and  smiles - a broad crescent of predatory teeth. 00:02:10.400 --> 00:02:16.440 “I had this room designed specially for my  unusual feeding habits, Keith,” he says,   00:02:16.440 --> 00:02:20.760 taking entirely too much pleasure in  it. “That vent you’re taking so much   00:02:20.760 --> 00:02:26.400 interest in, it’s for catching the  spillage. I can’t abide by mess.” 00:02:26.400 --> 00:02:30.800 The Cannibal takes out the filet  knife - clean, cold, and deadly,   00:02:30.800 --> 00:02:36.400 just like him - and sets to work.  No point in delaying the fun now. 00:02:36.400 --> 00:02:40.520 Later that night, once the Cannibal has  finished hosing down the larder and cooking,   00:02:40.520 --> 00:02:44.840 he ladles some delicious meat stew into  one of his fine China bowls. He takes a   00:02:44.840 --> 00:02:52.480 sip. Warm and delicious, like wings of golden  light spreading in his chest. Intern Keith is   00:02:52.480 --> 00:02:56.800 actually some good to him now. Life  can be full of surprises like that. 00:02:56.800 --> 00:03:00.600 The next day, as the Cannibal sits in the  corner office of his beloved high rise,   00:03:00.600 --> 00:03:06.960 sending off emails to his most treasured clients,  he feels so wonderfully at peace. He always feels   00:03:06.960 --> 00:03:11.160 that way after a feeding. It affirms what he  holds to be one of the foundational facts of   00:03:11.160 --> 00:03:19.360 his reality: Human beings are just cattle. He’s  the predator, and the rest of them are prey. 00:03:19.360 --> 00:03:24.320 The detectives come prying in the afternoon.  He expects that much. They ask him the standard   00:03:24.320 --> 00:03:29.840 battery of questions: Details about his own life  and history, his limited interactions with Intern   00:03:29.840 --> 00:03:35.400 Keith, whether he noticed anything… Strange.  The Cannibal plays the part of the concerned   00:03:35.400 --> 00:03:40.720 citizen perfectly. He assures the detectives that,  sadly, he doesn’t have any information that will   00:03:40.720 --> 00:03:46.960 be of any use to them - But he hopes that the poor  fellow is found safely. While he says that part,   00:03:46.960 --> 00:03:51.360 he tongues a stringy little fiber of  Keith still stuck between his molars. 00:03:51.360 --> 00:03:56.360 When the detectives leave, he feels the  ultimate thrill: He got away with it.   00:03:56.360 --> 00:04:01.080 The only evidence that could put him away is  currently moving through his lower intestine.   00:04:01.080 --> 00:04:07.200 The transgression emboldens him. He normally  only feeds once a month, but what would be the   00:04:07.200 --> 00:04:12.200 harm of going for a double this time, just  to celebrate how well the first one went? 00:04:12.200 --> 00:04:17.640 He grins to himself. Yes,  tonight it will happen again. 00:04:17.640 --> 00:04:22.000 Cut to the dark streets in the poorer part of  town, where he prowls in his Mercedes Benz like   00:04:22.000 --> 00:04:28.440 a metal crocodile. Rain falls like deadly  knives. The asphalt his river. His hunting   00:04:28.440 --> 00:04:34.200 ground. Nobody misses people here, and that’s  something he’s counting on. As he drives and   00:04:34.200 --> 00:04:39.680 seeks out his next victim, he finds himself  reminiscing fondly about his past meals. 00:04:39.680 --> 00:04:43.560 There was the lonely woman walking home from  the gym. He watched her working out through   00:04:43.560 --> 00:04:48.960 the glass all night, feeling his hunger  grow. He’s a patient ambush predator.   00:04:48.960 --> 00:04:53.320 When she left the gym he got out of his car  and pulled a black balaclava over his face,   00:04:53.320 --> 00:04:57.120 a hammer hidden inside the sleeve of  his jacket. She didn’t turn around   00:04:57.120 --> 00:05:02.720 until he was right behind her, and by  then, well, it was already too late. 00:05:02.720 --> 00:05:05.240 She made a passable meat loaf. 00:05:05.240 --> 00:05:10.200 Of course, there was the roadside mechanic. He was  easy enough. All it took was a phone stolen from   00:05:10.200 --> 00:05:15.680 a previous victim and a long, dark back road. He  turned up in the middle of the night to solve what   00:05:15.680 --> 00:05:21.760 he thought was a car problem, but was, in fact,  a problem of desire. He can’t hide his surprise   00:05:21.760 --> 00:05:26.600 when he sees the cannibal step out of the dark  with a handgun in his steely grip. He went so   00:05:26.600 --> 00:05:32.560 placidly into the back of the Cannibal’s  car, as meek and obedient as a baby lamb. 00:05:32.560 --> 00:05:35.440 He made wonderful steaks later that night. 00:05:35.440 --> 00:05:39.960 And how could he forget the teenage boy that  he lured over to his home by pretending to be a   00:05:39.960 --> 00:05:46.120 girl his age online? People are so easy to trick  when they think they’re getting what they want. 00:05:46.120 --> 00:05:49.800 Back in the present, he’s selected  his target. He parks on the side of   00:05:49.800 --> 00:05:53.040 the curb when he sees a homeless  woman bundled up in the cold. He   00:05:53.040 --> 00:05:58.040 can give her a warm place for the  night. Just not the kind she expects. 00:05:58.040 --> 00:06:03.200 The Cannibal slides out of his car, his form  hidden behind a long, expensive raincoat. He   00:06:03.200 --> 00:06:07.440 slides up to the homeless woman and nudges  her with his foot until she wakes up,   00:06:07.440 --> 00:06:13.560 confused and annoyed. He feels like a thrill  tonight. A real hunt. When she asks him what   00:06:13.560 --> 00:06:19.600 the big idea is, waking her up like that, instead  of answering with words, he reaches into his coat. 00:06:19.600 --> 00:06:22.280 And pulls out an axe. 00:06:22.280 --> 00:06:28.240 Her eyes widen when she sees it. This man,  this monster, means her terrible harm. She   00:06:28.240 --> 00:06:33.120 wills herself up to her feet, surfing a cascade  of adrenaline, and starts to run down the street,   00:06:33.120 --> 00:06:40.320 screaming for help. Exactly like he wants  her to. That’s when the chase begins. 00:06:40.320 --> 00:06:44.920 As shutters close and lights turn off, the  homeless woman tears down the cold and desolate   00:06:44.920 --> 00:06:49.040 streets. The people in this neighborhood  know better than to poke their nose into   00:06:49.040 --> 00:06:53.800 somebody else’s business. They’ve been trained  to close their eyes and just be thankful it’s   00:06:53.800 --> 00:06:59.880 not them. Their apathy is the Cannibal’s  greatest ally in these monstrous hunts. 00:06:59.880 --> 00:07:04.840 The woman tries banging up against indifferent  doors, her cheeks streaked with tears. No   00:07:04.840 --> 00:07:10.440 response. The Cannibal keeps up at a steady jog,  honed over countless hours on the treadmill at   00:07:10.440 --> 00:07:16.360 his favorite premium gym. He can catch her  at any time he wants, but it thrills him to   00:07:16.360 --> 00:07:24.280 prolong the chase. The pursuit is the only time  he feels like his true self - the predator inside. 00:07:24.280 --> 00:07:28.240 But the homeless woman hasn’t given up.  She refuses to lay down and become prey   00:07:28.240 --> 00:07:32.720 to the monster with the axe. When she  realizes that nobody else will help her,   00:07:32.720 --> 00:07:37.480 she’s left with one option:  She needs to protect herself. 00:07:37.480 --> 00:07:41.520 Cutting through tape marked “KEEP OUT”, she  runs into a barren construction site - the   00:07:41.520 --> 00:07:45.040 ghost of what was once meant to  be a mall, but it fell through.   00:07:45.040 --> 00:07:50.000 Like everything else out here. With her  bare feet stinging against coarse gravel,   00:07:50.000 --> 00:07:53.760 she runs towards some half-completed stairs  at the base level of the construction   00:07:53.760 --> 00:07:59.080 site and begins scaling them, flight after  flight, with some inhuman wind at her back. 00:07:59.080 --> 00:08:02.880 Not far behind, the Cannibal grips  the lacquered wood of the axe handle,   00:08:02.880 --> 00:08:09.240 taking steady strides. The fear, he thinks,  will only make her taste better. There’s no   00:08:09.240 --> 00:08:13.960 way in hell that some poor stray like  this would ever be able to best him. 00:08:13.960 --> 00:08:16.680 There’s one thing that the  Cannibal underestimates:   00:08:16.680 --> 00:08:22.600 His would-be victim’s will to survive. And  that’s a mistake that will cost him dearly. 00:08:22.600 --> 00:08:26.600 The Cannibal’s pursuit of the homeless woman  leads him onto one of the construction site’s   00:08:26.600 --> 00:08:30.960 many vacant floors, filled with ghostly  sheets of translucent plastic and metal   00:08:30.960 --> 00:08:35.720 support beams. It’s like something out of a  cheap horror film - the perfect setting for   00:08:35.720 --> 00:08:41.040 an axe murder. And the Cannibal more  than intends to fulfil that prophecy. 00:08:41.040 --> 00:08:44.880 He stalks through the sheets of plastic,  dragging his axe along the ground behind   00:08:44.880 --> 00:08:49.920 him with a menacing scrape. She’s got to be  around here somewhere. He checks behind some   00:08:49.920 --> 00:08:55.520 old cement drums. Nothing. He takes the  time to peer around each concrete pillar,   00:08:55.520 --> 00:08:59.440 his nice shoes making a pleasing  tap, tap, tap on the ground. 00:09:00.040 --> 00:09:04.920 “I know you’re around here somewhere,”  he says. “Don’t think you’re getting one   00:09:04.920 --> 00:09:11.760 over on me. This is the fun part;  I’m just working up an appetite.” 00:09:11.760 --> 00:09:16.760 This is where he makes his fatal error.  He’s wearing a nice pair of lace-up shoes,   00:09:16.760 --> 00:09:22.280 and she isn’t wearing anything on her feet at  all. So while he’s gloating and taunting, he   00:09:22.280 --> 00:09:27.840 can’t hear her quietly walking up behind him. He  doesn’t even realize she’s there until something   00:09:27.840 --> 00:09:32.800 strikes the back of his head with tremendous  force, knocking him to the ground, dazed and   00:09:32.800 --> 00:09:39.000 eyes full of bright white flashes. The axe falls  to the ground next to him, just out of his reach. 00:09:39.000 --> 00:09:43.680 He turns, his hair already dirtied with  blood, and sees her standing over him:   00:09:43.680 --> 00:09:48.000 She’s carrying a length of rebar, the  top curdled into a club of hard concrete,   00:09:48.000 --> 00:09:53.720 stained red. She doesn’t give him a chance  to get out a word, she hits him again and   00:09:53.720 --> 00:10:00.680 again. His arms. His legs. His ribs. His face.  She beats him within an inch of his life and   00:10:00.680 --> 00:10:06.280 leaves him there in the cold, surrounded  by ghostly sheets of billowing plastic. 00:10:06.280 --> 00:10:11.720 The Cannibal lays there, too agonized  to move. It isn’t long before he sees   00:10:11.720 --> 00:10:16.640 the flashing red and blue of police  lights; the wail of sirens. He knows   00:10:16.640 --> 00:10:22.200 his cursed lie of a life is over,  and he can’t even make a run for it. 00:10:22.200 --> 00:10:26.320 What follows is a blur for the Cannibal, but  a major piece of news for everyone who knew   00:10:26.320 --> 00:10:31.360 him. He’s arrested and booked. They search  his apartment and find what the press take   00:10:31.360 --> 00:10:35.680 to calling his “Kill Room”, specially  designed to aid in the butchering and   00:10:35.680 --> 00:10:40.400 devouring of his victims. They find the  evidence in his bedroom safe - Trophies,   00:10:40.400 --> 00:10:44.440 trinkets he’s taken from his former  meals. They definitively connect him   00:10:44.440 --> 00:10:50.280 to twelve different local disappearances,  none of which he has convincing alibis for. 00:10:50.280 --> 00:10:56.120 In other words, the Cannibal, who has given  this fate to so many others… Is cooked. 00:10:56.120 --> 00:10:59.960 Because of the publicity around the case,  and the grand sense of public shock,   00:10:59.960 --> 00:11:04.120 the judge felt pressured to throw the book  at the Cannibal. He was sentenced to death   00:11:04.120 --> 00:11:08.680 by lethal injection. Upon hearing the  sentence, the Cannibal bursts into   00:11:08.680 --> 00:11:13.440 tears in the court room. It becomes a viral  twitter moment. He spends a quarter of the   00:11:13.440 --> 00:11:19.960 time a typical convict spends on death row -  it’s a quiet and lonely time. A living hell. 00:11:19.960 --> 00:11:25.240 At least, he thinks, it’ll be over when they’ve  pumped him full of deadly chemicals. The hatred.   00:11:25.240 --> 00:11:30.840 The humiliation. He won’t be able to hear it  anymore. It comforts him as they strap him down   00:11:30.840 --> 00:11:36.880 to the gurney and insert the syringes  into his veins. Everything goes dark. 00:11:36.880 --> 00:11:43.640 And then he wakes up in neither Heaven nor  Hell. He wakes up in a crowded secure bunk   00:11:43.640 --> 00:11:49.040 wearing an orange jumpsuit, surrounded by  so many others like him. Other haunted,   00:11:49.040 --> 00:11:54.920 broken men, confused and huddled. Occasionally,  armed men would enter the bunk and remove one or   00:11:54.920 --> 00:12:01.680 two of the orange jumpsuited men. Sometimes they  would come back. Most of the time, they wouldn’t. 00:12:01.680 --> 00:12:05.800 The Cannibal notices one man coming in  and out. Every time, he seems a little   00:12:05.800 --> 00:12:11.360 more shaken. Driven by his curiosity, the  Cannibal approaches this veteran prisoner   00:12:11.360 --> 00:12:16.800 and asks him what’s out there. Who are their  captors? What is going to happen to them here? 00:12:16.800 --> 00:12:20.680 The answer he hears fills him with terrible dread. 00:12:20.680 --> 00:12:24.680 They’re in some kind of laboratory. When  they’re extracted from the bunk and taken   00:12:24.680 --> 00:12:29.600 out into the testing areas, they’re  exposed to cursed objects. Monsters.   00:12:29.600 --> 00:12:34.640 Entities beyond comprehension. The veteran  tells the Cannibal about a giant reptile,   00:12:34.640 --> 00:12:39.560 perpetually submerged in a giant tank of  acid. A plague doctor forever working on   00:12:39.560 --> 00:12:44.800 Frankenstein-esque zombies, cobbled out of  the corpses of their kind. That terrible   00:12:44.800 --> 00:12:50.560 rotten man in the dark room, who can  go through walls and feeds on pain. 00:12:50.560 --> 00:12:53.960 Eventually, every single one of  them will be called out to face   00:12:53.960 --> 00:13:00.400 judgment. To be the subject of some terrible  experiment. Perhaps it’s worse than hell:   00:13:00.400 --> 00:13:04.560 The eventual fate, and the  seemingly eternal wait for it. 00:13:04.560 --> 00:13:09.960 When the time comes, the Cannibal’s number is  called. A pair of strangers in black tactical   00:13:09.960 --> 00:13:14.560 gear and pistols holstered at their hips.  He feels cold sweat congregating on his   00:13:14.560 --> 00:13:19.640 brow. Is this it? Is he going to be  fed to monsters or shoved into some   00:13:19.640 --> 00:13:24.640 nightmarish pocket dimension? Used for  live target practice or in some twisted   00:13:24.640 --> 00:13:29.200 experiment by an immortal plague doctor?  After having his head filled with horror   00:13:29.200 --> 00:13:36.840 stories by all his fellow prisoners, he  feels fear. True and pure and paralyzing. 00:13:36.840 --> 00:13:42.520 Is this how all of his victims felt before  the knife slashed or the axe came down? 00:13:42.520 --> 00:13:47.440 The men in the tactical gear walk him down a  long, narrow alleyway into another secure room.   00:13:47.440 --> 00:13:51.600 It reminds him of the police interrogation  room he’d seen when he was first arrested:   00:13:51.600 --> 00:13:57.800 Plain white tiles, a metal table in the middle of  the room. He’s encouraged to sit and he does so,   00:13:57.800 --> 00:14:02.800 feeling his heart pound away in his rib  cage - a prisoner inside a prisoner. It   00:14:02.800 --> 00:14:08.000 feels like he’s waiting for an eternity for  that door to open, and a scientist to walk in. 00:14:08.000 --> 00:14:15.160 The scientist is carrying a paper bag. A bag that  might contain all manner of inconceivable horrors.   00:14:15.160 --> 00:14:19.200 The Cannibal even flinches when the scientist  puts it on the table in front of him, expecting   00:14:19.200 --> 00:14:26.120 that something might leap out and attack without  warning. But no, the bag remains deathly still. 00:14:26.120 --> 00:14:29.040 And the scientist encourages him to open it. 00:14:29.680 --> 00:14:34.320 With trepidation in his pounding heart,  the Cannibal opens the bag and reaches   00:14:34.320 --> 00:14:42.200 inside. Waiting for him within is a hamburger.  Still warm. He wonders at the catch - Will the   00:14:42.200 --> 00:14:47.640 burger eat him? Will he explode after taking  a bite, or turn into stone? Or some kind of   00:14:47.640 --> 00:14:54.280 monster? All the horrible possibilities feel  infinite. He tries to delay. To stall. But the   00:14:54.280 --> 00:15:00.560 inevitability of it all sinks in: He needs  to take a bite of the terrifying burger. 00:15:00.560 --> 00:15:07.000 The Cannibal sinks his teeth in, taking a cautious  bite and waiting for the other shoe to drop. But,   00:15:07.000 --> 00:15:13.080 to his immense surprise, it just seems  to be… A normal burger. He takes a look   00:15:13.080 --> 00:15:18.960 at the brown paper bag again. There’s a faded  logo on it reading, “Quick an’ Ready Mealz.” 00:15:18.960 --> 00:15:24.280 He’s confused. The researcher clears  their throat, and asks a single question:   00:15:24.280 --> 00:15:28.000 “Did what you just eat have the  taste and texture of human flesh?” 00:15:28.000 --> 00:15:33.440 The Cannibal, wondering if this is some  kind of trick question, shakes his head. No,   00:15:33.440 --> 00:15:37.480 it’s just a perfectly normal  burger. What’s the catch? 00:15:37.480 --> 00:15:41.800 But he never finds out the catch. Instead,  the researcher thanks him for his time,   00:15:41.800 --> 00:15:45.880 and the guards take him back to his cell to  await some other experiment that requires his   00:15:45.880 --> 00:15:55.360 services. He’ll never know the truth of SCP-971.  But you will, dear viewer - right now, in fact. 00:15:55.360 --> 00:16:00.760 SCP-971 refers to a collection of worn takeout  menus from an unknown food delivery service   00:16:00.760 --> 00:16:06.360 going by the name “Quick N’ Ready Mealz.” Its  supposed parent company denies any knowledge of   00:16:06.360 --> 00:16:12.360 its existence, and no official business records of  the company have been found. To the untrained eye,   00:16:12.360 --> 00:16:17.200 they don’t even appear to be out of the ordinary.  The menu lists several standard takeout items:   00:16:17.200 --> 00:16:21.360 Burgers, chicken sandwiches,  chicken fingers, fries, and soda. 00:16:21.360 --> 00:16:24.960 If you call the number on the menu, you’ll be  greeted by an online directory on the other   00:16:24.960 --> 00:16:29.480 side of the line - inviting you to put in the  numbers corresponding to your order. After this,   00:16:29.480 --> 00:16:33.000 your credit card will be charged and,  within fifteen to twenty minutes,   00:16:33.000 --> 00:16:37.320 a paper bag bearing the Quick N’ Ready  Mealz logo will appear on your doorstep.   00:16:37.320 --> 00:16:42.520 You’ll probably enjoy the meal, except for  one thing… Even if you ordered chicken,   00:16:42.520 --> 00:16:46.200 you won’t quite be able to place the  flavor of the meat you’re eating. 00:16:46.200 --> 00:16:51.800 That’s where our Cannibal came in - better  known to the Foundation as D-1282. Naturally,   00:16:51.800 --> 00:16:56.320 the Foundation’s first theory as to the  nature of the SCP-971 mystery meat was   00:16:56.320 --> 00:16:59.080 that it was human flesh. There was no real reason   00:16:59.080 --> 00:17:03.240 for this, other than the fact that, when the  Foundation deals with meat-based anomalies,   00:17:03.240 --> 00:17:08.960 it often ends up being some variation on human  flesh. However, when our fine young cannibal   00:17:08.960 --> 00:17:15.800 took a bite of his SCP-971 burger, he was just  as confused by its contents as anybody else. 00:17:15.800 --> 00:17:18.640 That’s because the contents  of the meat wasn’t, in fact,   00:17:18.640 --> 00:17:23.280 human flesh. It was something much, much stranger. 00:17:23.280 --> 00:17:29.280 All of the meat from SCP-971 has been sourced  from animals on the EEC Endangered Animals List,   00:17:29.280 --> 00:17:34.840 including pandas, cheetahs, red wolves, and  other endangered mammals. And strangely enough,   00:17:34.840 --> 00:17:39.680 these creatures don’t seem to necessarily be  harmed by the process. After the ordering of   00:17:39.680 --> 00:17:45.160 the SCP-971 meals with meat content, endangered  animals in the surrounding area were weighed,   00:17:45.160 --> 00:17:49.040 and were found to have lower biomass  than they previously did. Of course,   00:17:49.040 --> 00:17:53.480 if enough orders were made this might eventually  create an existential threat for the animals,   00:17:53.480 --> 00:17:58.400 but so far, there have been no reported  animal deaths connected to the anomaly. 00:17:58.400 --> 00:18:02.840 But other than this, there have been no  reported anomalous effects. No memetic   00:18:02.840 --> 00:18:07.480 hazards. No compulsive behavior. The food  has no meaningful effect on the consumer,   00:18:07.480 --> 00:18:11.280 and most people who order the food will  not know that they’ve even engaged with   00:18:11.280 --> 00:18:15.520 an anomaly. Aside from the menus already  in storage, the going orders to field   00:18:15.520 --> 00:18:19.640 agents are to log and destroy any of  the menus they might find in the wild. 00:18:19.640 --> 00:18:22.000 As an incredibly low-risk Safe class,   00:18:22.000 --> 00:18:26.080 the surviving Quick N’ Ready Mealz menus  are kept in filing cabinet number 26 in   00:18:26.080 --> 00:18:30.640 the Site 19 file vault. In order to  requisition the menu for testing,   00:18:30.640 --> 00:18:35.480 you need permission from a member of personnel  ranked at Level 4 or above - Though tests are   00:18:35.480 --> 00:18:41.120 not permitted more than once a week due to the  potentially detrimental environmental impact. 00:18:41.120 --> 00:18:44.800 If you’re anything like me, there’s a  drawer or cabinet in your home that’s   00:18:44.800 --> 00:18:49.200 spent the last several years accumulating a  large number of local takeout menus - Many   00:18:49.200 --> 00:18:53.040 of which you can’t quite place a point  of origin for. In case you’re worried   00:18:53.040 --> 00:18:57.560 that your next late night snack session could  lead to harm befalling an endangered animal,   00:18:57.560 --> 00:19:02.160 might I recommend just playing it safe  and using DoorDash instead. #NotSponsored. 00:19:02.160 --> 00:19:07.200 Check out the Doctor Bob Patreon and  become a junior researcher today! Now go   00:19:07.200 --> 00:19:15.080 and watch another entry from the files of  Doctor Bob, SCP-2611 Large and In Charge!