WEBVTT
Kind: captions
Language: en

00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:04.080
[Ruffles through desk]

00:00:10.620 --> 00:00:11.120
[Slams remote]

00:00:20.900 --> 00:00:22.780
The war is already won.

00:00:22.780 --> 00:00:25.580
I found a loophole in the Pewdiepie vs T-Series war.

00:00:25.580 --> 00:00:26.480
What?

00:00:26.480 --> 00:00:27.060
Nani

00:00:27.060 --> 00:00:30.880
"Youtube music is at 105 million subscribers..."

00:00:31.400 --> 00:00:33.160
Who the hell is Pewdiepie's wage slave?

00:00:33.160 --> 00:00:35.640
[Laugh]

00:00:35.680 --> 00:00:39.980
"...so T-Series would not be the first channel to get 200 million..."

00:00:39.980 --> 00:00:42.920
"...but Pewdiepie would be the first..."

00:00:42.920 --> 00:00:45.200
"...youtuber to get to 1 million."

00:00:45.200 --> 00:00:47.380
[Cheers]

00:00:47.380 --> 00:00:50.520
Holy heck guys! This changes everything!

00:00:50.520 --> 00:00:52.620
Oh my god!

00:00:52.620 --> 00:00:54.220
[Mockingly] We win by default.

00:00:54.220 --> 00:00:56.100
Well we still have to hit a hundred million.

00:00:56.340 --> 00:00:58.180
Brofist at a hundred million.

00:00:58.180 --> 00:01:07.060
"If Pewds starts a family, we would have 3 pies, Pewdiepie, Cutiepie, and the kid would be named?"

00:01:08.160 --> 00:01:10.160
"Creampie."

00:01:10.160 --> 00:01:16.040
[Silence]

00:01:16.060 --> 00:01:16.560
Now hol-

00:01:17.660 --> 00:01:20.480
"Visited a historical place today."

00:01:20.480 --> 00:01:22.140
[Laugh]

00:01:22.140 --> 00:01:24.480
Oh.. You found just a spot didn't you?

00:01:24.480 --> 00:01:30.040
People are visiting from all across the world to b-be at this holy spot.

00:01:30.040 --> 00:01:33.980
What video did you make this week that you're proud of? Share below.

00:01:33.980 --> 00:01:35.420
The one you demonetized.

00:01:35.420 --> 00:01:35.920
Cool.

00:01:35.920 --> 00:01:39.720
You basically still put my name all over any Panda's tweet.

00:01:39.720 --> 00:01:40.860
[Laughs]

00:01:40.860 --> 00:01:44.960
Everyone's like: "it's against... it's big corporations versus..."

00:01:45.720 --> 00:01:46.320
"... individuals."

00:01:46.560 --> 00:01:51.040
Meanwhile me, big creator, stomping over these smaller Youtubers.

00:01:51.040 --> 00:01:52.220
[Laughs]

00:01:52.220 --> 00:01:53.140
"I cracked the system..."

00:01:53.140 --> 00:01:57.320
"Did you know if Felix puts a giant watermark on screen whenever he says something..."

00:01:57.660 --> 00:02:02.620
"...controversial, stating this was taken out of context, the media cannot use it as evidence."

00:02:02.620 --> 00:02:05.160
No, they'll just use it as a quote, anyway.

00:02:05.160 --> 00:02:09.200
Listen, I'm not trying to get on the hectic media rhetoric.

00:02:09.460 --> 00:02:13.000
But they can just take whatever as a quote and say that's it.

00:02:13.200 --> 00:02:18.140
It's not like they're gonna be "Oh there was a watermark on this saying that it was out of context."

00:02:18.140 --> 00:02:23.120
"Turns down quality to 240p to save mobile data"

00:02:23.540 --> 00:02:28.740
"Youtube: Loads 2 minute ad in 1080p and 60fps."

00:02:28.740 --> 00:02:30.520
[Laughing] "My data plan:"

00:02:30.520 --> 00:02:31.660
This is so sad.

00:02:32.080 --> 00:02:34.360
I am crying in a nutshell.

00:02:34.360 --> 00:02:36.360
"If you don't get this you all are going to hell."

00:02:36.360 --> 00:02:38.360
"Stop dating boys who don't understand this."

00:02:38.360 --> 00:02:39.340
Okay...

00:02:39.340 --> 00:02:40.360
Bob.

00:02:40.360 --> 00:02:42.360
[Window's Shut Down Tone]

00:02:42.360 --> 00:02:45.140
[Silence]

00:02:45.140 --> 00:02:47.100
What is that?

00:02:47.100 --> 00:02:50.340
[Suspenseful Music]

00:02:50.380 --> 00:02:52.700
Vegan- ah...

00:02:52.700 --> 00:02:53.200
Witch...

00:02:53.200 --> 00:02:53.700
Ever...

00:02:53.700 --> 00:02:54.200
Will...

00:02:54.200 --> 00:02:54.700
It...

00:02:54.700 --> 00:02:55.720
Bee...

00:02:55.720 --> 00:02:57.300
[Laughs]

00:02:57.300 --> 00:02:59.100
Sit the frick down.

00:02:59.100 --> 00:03:01.420
"This game is still relevant..."

00:03:01.420 --> 00:03:02.900
NUMBER ONE IN TRENDING FOR GAMING?!

00:03:03.920 --> 00:03:05.180
Holy heck guys.

00:03:05.180 --> 00:03:08.100
That's it from now on, I'm a Happy Wheels gamer.

00:03:08.740 --> 00:03:09.680
A hundred episodes.

00:03:09.680 --> 00:03:11.180
Let's go gamers!

00:03:11.760 --> 00:03:14.400
"Modern problems require older solutions."

00:03:14.400 --> 00:03:15.600
[Laughs]

00:03:15.600 --> 00:03:20.160
More Happy Wheels coming soon, and then Minecraft, and then more Happy Wheels.

00:03:20.160 --> 00:03:22.520
We're go-gonna go full loop on this channel.

00:03:22.520 --> 00:03:24.960
We're gonna go back to the call of duty commentaries.

00:03:24.960 --> 00:03:29.480
"When you clap your hands two times but no one in your friend group screams MEME REVIEW!"

00:03:29.740 --> 00:03:31.400
YES!!! [Laughs]

00:03:31.880 --> 00:03:33.060
"Stepped on holy ground."

00:03:33.060 --> 00:03:36.000
There it is... another... another pilgrimage.

00:03:36.160 --> 00:03:37.980
From another nine-year-old.

00:03:37.980 --> 00:03:39.480
Thank you. Very cool.

00:03:39.480 --> 00:03:40.560
"Avengers deleted scene."

00:03:40.560 --> 00:03:41.740
[Laughs]

00:03:41.740 --> 00:03:47.220
Thanos ass looks like ass implants if the silicone was turned upside down.. if you've seen those videos?

00:03:47.820 --> 00:03:49.620
I-i'm disappointed.

00:03:49.620 --> 00:03:51.360
I thought Thanos was thick.

00:03:51.360 --> 00:03:54.680
"When you were supposed to have memes running on you but nobody cares anymore."

00:03:54.680 --> 00:03:56.960
"Sad static noises."

00:03:56.960 --> 00:03:58.140
STOP CRYING

00:03:58.140 --> 00:04:04.580
This guy will reach 100 mil one day and 1.3% of the population will be subbed to him.

00:04:04.580 --> 00:04:06.340
Jesus Christ.

00:04:06.340 --> 00:04:08.340
What is wrong with our planet?

00:04:08.960 --> 00:04:12.200
Is there nothing more important happening right now?

00:04:12.200 --> 00:04:15.160
Is that when we hit 8 million? Someone commented that?

00:04:15.160 --> 00:04:16.700
This man was from the future.

00:04:16.700 --> 00:04:18.800
He predicted the future.

00:04:18.820 --> 00:04:23.040
You know when we hit 60, that's when things started goin- feeling ridiculous to me.

00:04:23.040 --> 00:04:27.920
That's when I went like, okay, a-at this point I'm just seeing how far we can push it.

00:04:28.780 --> 00:04:31.420
Hundred mil? Jesus f*cking Christ.

00:04:31.920 --> 00:04:33.920
"Can we get the same likes as dislikes?"

00:04:33.940 --> 00:04:36.200
Can this video get same likes as dislikes.

00:04:36.200 --> 00:04:36.700
[Laughs]

00:04:36.700 --> 00:04:37.920
It's still going!

00:04:37.920 --> 00:04:41.460
[Laughs]

00:04:41.500 --> 00:04:45.800
"So perfectly balanced... as all things should be."

00:04:45.800 --> 00:04:46.670
[Laughs]

00:04:46.670 --> 00:04:48.670
Oh yeah, it's almost hit a million!

00:04:48.740 --> 00:04:53.890
Damn, if this can hit one mil- ah- ten million views at the same time it hits a million comments...

00:04:54.400 --> 00:04:56.400
...that would be lit as frick. Here you go proves Ricardo is the best girlfriend average build Ricardo rip this

00:04:56.740 --> 00:04:58.740
"Here you go, proves Ricardo is the best."

00:04:59.400 --> 00:05:00.820
"Girlfriend, average build."

00:05:00.820 --> 00:05:02.540
"Ricardo, ripped AF."

00:05:03.440 --> 00:05:05.440
"Girlfriend, needs constant attention."

00:05:05.690 --> 00:05:08.109
"Ricardo, only has attention to give."

00:05:08.900 --> 00:05:10.900
"Girlfriend, clean shaven face."

00:05:11.180 --> 00:05:14.020
"Ricardo, God-like goatee."

00:05:14.020 --> 00:05:14.820
That's right.

00:05:14.820 --> 00:05:21.440
If your girlfriend doesn't have a goatee it's time to yeety that girl, go away-tee.

00:05:21.620 --> 00:05:23.620
"Girlfriend, usually wears a shirt."

00:05:24.500 --> 00:05:27.910
Excuse me, girl never wore the shirt in his life!

00:05:29.480 --> 00:05:31.480
"Has okay tits."

00:05:31.480 --> 00:05:32.040
[Laughs]

00:05:32.040 --> 00:05:35.060
"Ricardo, has monster pecs."

00:05:35.060 --> 00:05:38.500
"Takes an hour to prepare hair."

00:05:38.500 --> 00:05:40.740
"Bandana welded into his skull."

00:05:40.740 --> 00:05:42.220
[Laughs]

00:05:42.860 --> 00:05:44.920
"Girlfriend, new Superman abilities."

00:05:45.560 --> 00:05:49.660
"Ricardo, immortal, bends the universe at his will"

00:05:50.240 --> 00:05:53.600
Ricardo, the only man who can defeat Thanos.

00:05:53.860 --> 00:05:58.480
If he doesn't appear in End Game Marvel, whatever that movie is called...

00:05:58.900 --> 00:06:02.720
...then I'm going to have to make "Why I Don't Like Marvel Movies Part 2."

00:06:02.870 --> 00:06:03.669
That's right.

00:06:03.669 --> 00:06:06.860
The most controversial video I have ever uploaded on this channel.

00:06:06.860 --> 00:06:13.480
"Pewdiepie is the only wrapper in history to write a diss track so fire he got banned from a continent..."

00:06:13.480 --> 00:06:16.100
"...thus making him the greatest rapper of all time."

00:06:16.100 --> 00:06:20.480
[Silence]

00:06:20.480 --> 00:06:22.380
[Laugh]

00:06:22.380 --> 00:06:24.000
2019.. uhm.

00:06:24.000 --> 00:06:26.100
It never fails to amaze me.

00:06:26.100 --> 00:06:28.240
"Hey Time magazine, I fixed your list."

00:06:28.240 --> 00:06:32.560
"If a person who has gotten billionaires to talk memes, raised hundreds of thousands for charity..."

00:06:32.560 --> 00:06:36.800
"...and started a worldwide movement to subscribe doesn't make your list, it's not a very good list."

00:06:37.100 --> 00:06:39.160
Damn MatPat with the support.

00:06:39.160 --> 00:06:41.500
Thank you very much. That's really sweet of you.

00:06:41.500 --> 00:06:43.760
I understand, Time.

00:06:43.760 --> 00:06:50.180
The-they can't acknowledge people they feel like are doing something negative. Doing something negative

00:06:50.900 --> 00:06:54.300
At least that was that's how interpret it.

00:06:54.300 --> 00:06:56.120
Well Donald Trump is on it so.

00:06:56.120 --> 00:07:00.300
"Felix: Get Pewdiepie's Dad to tell us embarrassing childhood stories."

00:07:00.300 --> 00:07:05.100
"Felix: he has none, because I was the perfect child in every single way possible."

00:07:05.940 --> 00:07:12.020
"Pewds Mom: We used to call you Felicia because you liked dressing up as a girl when you were a kid."

00:07:12.020 --> 00:07:15.600
[Silence]

00:07:15.600 --> 00:07:17.840
I have no memory of this. Just for the record.

00:07:18.160 --> 00:07:21.300
Maybe I have a fake memory. You know why?

00:07:21.300 --> 00:07:22.100
I'll tell you why.

00:07:22.100 --> 00:07:27.040
Okay, there is nothing wrong with breaking down gender stereotypes.

00:07:27.040 --> 00:07:30.520
I wanted to dress up as her. Okay? She was my favorite character.

00:07:30.520 --> 00:07:31.340
[Laughs]

00:07:31.340 --> 00:07:33.320
Don't judge me!

00:07:33.510 --> 00:07:37.280
So I remember going to school with uh that hair cut.

00:07:37.280 --> 00:07:39.660
[Laughs]

00:07:39.660 --> 00:07:41.660
I must have been like three years old like...

00:07:41.660 --> 00:07:43.940
[Windows powering down sound]

00:07:43.940 --> 00:07:51.320
[Silence]

00:07:51.320 --> 00:07:53.780
[High pitched steam sound]

00:07:53.780 --> 00:07:58.340
"Post with 10k upvotes and has nothing to do with PewDiePie."

00:07:58.340 --> 00:07:59.500
"My downvote."

00:07:59.500 --> 00:08:02.320
I kinda like that the Subreddit is not just about me.

00:08:02.320 --> 00:08:04.220
I don't mind that at all.

00:08:04.220 --> 00:08:06.820
"Have someone make an addiction where they're obsessed with PewDiePie."

00:08:06.820 --> 00:08:07.820
"Go on Dr. Phil."

00:08:07.860 --> 00:08:10.200
"Dr. Phil shows PewDiePie's content."

00:08:10.200 --> 00:08:12.900
"PewDiePie copy strikes Dr. Phil."

00:08:12.900 --> 00:08:15.500
"Sony: Wait a minute... That's illegal."

00:08:15.500 --> 00:08:20.220
What if I and talk only about my G fuel addiction.

00:08:20.220 --> 00:08:22.140
[Ding]

00:08:22.140 --> 00:08:23.680
Glug Glug Glug Glug Glug.

00:08:23.800 --> 00:08:25.800
10% off with code PewDiePie.

00:08:25.860 --> 00:08:27.860
Can I copy strike myself?

00:08:28.380 --> 00:08:29.520
This

00:08:29.520 --> 00:08:30.860
Rain

00:08:30.860 --> 00:08:33.140
bo ooooooooooooow

00:08:33.140 --> 00:08:35.140
issss

00:08:36.960 --> 00:08:39.040
stttttttiiiiccckkk

00:08:39.160 --> 00:08:40.640
releeeevant

00:08:40.740 --> 00:08:42.740
[Windows powering down sound]

00:08:42.740 --> 00:08:46.100
[Clock ticking sound]

00:08:46.960 --> 00:08:50.020
What is it minus or is it connected?

00:08:50.020 --> 00:08:52.020
It's a rainbooooww...

00:08:52.020 --> 00:09:01.080
[Clock ticking sound]

00:09:01.080 --> 00:09:03.040
This gaaaayy

00:09:03.040 --> 00:09:04.880
mmmm

00:09:04.880 --> 00:09:07.060
This game is....

00:09:07.060 --> 00:09:08.820
[Clock ticking sound]

00:09:08.820 --> 00:09:10.660
Why am I so slow? Come on.

00:09:10.660 --> 00:09:11.920
I can do this.

00:09:11.920 --> 00:09:12.940
Staaaa

00:09:12.940 --> 00:09:20.120
[Clock ticking sound]

00:09:20.160 --> 00:09:22.160
Is it fine? I don't get it?

00:09:22.160 --> 00:09:23.480
[Clock ticking sounds]

00:09:23.480 --> 00:09:25.480
Is....... is it sick?

00:09:25.480 --> 00:09:37.940
[Clock ticking sounds]

00:09:37.940 --> 00:09:41.140
Relevant goddamn.

00:09:41.140 --> 00:09:42.820
[Clock ticking sounds]

00:09:42.820 --> 00:09:43.320
It.

00:09:43.320 --> 00:09:44.660
[Laughs]

00:09:44.660 --> 00:09:46.640
[Clock ticking sounds]

00:09:46.640 --> 00:09:49.880
THIS GAME IS STILL RELEVANT GOD DAMN IT.

00:09:49.880 --> 00:09:54.760
[Laughs]

00:09:54.760 --> 00:09:56.000
I'm so dumb!

00:09:56.000 --> 00:09:59.940
Oh no! I'm so... oh... I'm stupid!

00:09:59.940 --> 00:10:02.720
Oh no I'm so stupid!

00:10:02.720 --> 00:10:04.480
I'm a dummy dumb.

00:10:04.480 --> 00:10:06.380
I'll always be dumb.

00:10:06.380 --> 00:10:07.680
Don't hurt me.

00:10:07.680 --> 00:10:08.680
I'm so stupid.

00:10:08.680 --> 00:10:10.240
I can't help it.

00:10:10.240 --> 00:10:11.280
Please.

00:10:11.300 --> 00:10:12.340
Please.

00:10:12.340 --> 00:10:13.380
Please.

00:10:13.380 --> 00:10:16.760
[Fake crying shriek]

00:10:16.760 --> 00:10:19.640
"Hi guys. I'm a thirteen year old nine year old ehhh."

00:10:19.640 --> 00:10:21.680
Wh-what the- what did I just read?

00:10:21.680 --> 00:10:23.120
I'm a thirteen year old nine-

00:10:23.120 --> 00:10:26.040
[Windows powering down sound]

00:10:26.040 --> 00:10:29.800
"I've saved up $400 for this chair and now I finally have it..."

00:10:29.800 --> 00:10:34.600
"...I'm not rich or even close to it, but this is my own money that I worked hard for. Thanks."

00:10:35.820 --> 00:10:38.000
They need help assembling it. I'll come over.

00:10:38.000 --> 00:10:38.820
[Laughs]

00:10:38.820 --> 00:10:41.100
It looks like you're having some trouble there.

00:10:41.740 --> 00:10:44.780
If you want a good chair and want to support me at the same time.

00:10:44.780 --> 00:10:47.900
I do very very very very much appreciate it.

00:10:48.080 --> 00:10:50.749
I hope one day I can give back in a better way then...

00:10:51.200 --> 00:10:53.040
...then what I've been doing.

00:10:53.120 --> 00:10:55.180
"Stop dating boys who don't understand this."

00:10:55.620 --> 00:10:57.000
Jesus Christ, another one?

00:10:57.000 --> 00:10:59.000
Guys, I can't do this.

00:10:59.000 --> 00:11:01.000
Exit your...

00:11:01.460 --> 00:11:04.100
I don't like when it says "N" that makes me scared.

00:11:04.100 --> 00:11:05.700
What does the "N" mean?

00:11:05.700 --> 00:11:07.700
Exit your nnnnnnnnnnn

00:11:07.700 --> 00:11:11.000
[Clock ticking sounds]

00:11:11.000 --> 00:11:13.240
Tree?

00:11:13.240 --> 00:11:13.760
Your?

00:11:13.760 --> 00:11:15.760
[Clock ticking sounds]

00:11:16.020 --> 00:11:19.100
Your nnn tree in?

00:11:19.100 --> 00:11:22.700
[Clock ticking sounds]

00:11:22.700 --> 00:11:23.880
Subreddit?

00:11:23.880 --> 00:11:28.300
[Clock ticking sounds]

00:11:28.300 --> 00:11:30.560
Brofist and?

00:11:30.560 --> 00:11:32.560
[Clock ticking sounds]

00:11:32.560 --> 00:11:35.040
What the hell?

00:11:35.040 --> 00:11:37.220
It's too hard I can't do it.

00:11:37.220 --> 00:11:39.220
[Laugh] [Clock ticking sounds]

00:11:39.340 --> 00:11:41.440
Exit your?

00:11:41.440 --> 00:11:42.360
What is that? It's a tree!

00:11:42.360 --> 00:11:43.700
Exit your?

00:11:43.700 --> 00:11:44.800
[Clock ticking sounds]

00:11:44.800 --> 00:11:46.100
Your and

00:11:46.100 --> 00:11:47.760
[Clock ticking sounds]

00:11:47.760 --> 00:11:51.200
Entry.. exit.. your entry.. entry.. that's what it is!

00:11:51.200 --> 00:11:53.050
[Clock ticking sounds]

00:11:53.050 --> 00:11:53.700
In...

00:11:53.700 --> 00:11:55.180
[Clock ticking sounds]

00:11:55.180 --> 00:12:01.820
Leave your entries in the subreddit bros and!!!!

00:12:01.920 --> 00:12:03.920
I'll!!!

00:12:03.920 --> 00:12:06.220
[Laugh] [Triumphant music]

00:12:06.220 --> 00:12:13.760
Watch submissions in the next episode of LWIAY!!

00:12:13.760 --> 00:12:15.640
[Laugh]

00:12:15.640 --> 00:12:18.560
I'm dumb.. I'm so stupiddd

00:12:19.600 --> 00:12:20.440
Noooo

00:12:20.440 --> 00:12:25.600
[Laugh]

00:12:25.800 --> 00:12:30.100
5,000 IQ. I am the smartest man.

00:12:30.460 --> 00:12:33.960
I- I am the smartest there has ever been smart.

00:12:34.300 --> 00:12:39.360
Don't question my power, for I will destroy all of you.

00:12:39.360 --> 00:12:41.160
PewDiePie!

00:12:41.160 --> 00:12:44.080
Can we go there like a party!

00:12:44.080 --> 00:12:45.520
That looks delicious.

00:12:45.520 --> 00:12:46.260
Whoah!

00:12:46.260 --> 00:12:47.740
[Music]

00:12:47.740 --> 00:12:49.740
That looks sick!

00:12:50.080 --> 00:12:53.480
Paper bag head! 10/10 dude!

00:12:53.640 --> 00:12:56.920
Damn, that's so cool.

00:12:57.860 --> 00:12:58.800
Whoah!

00:13:00.820 --> 00:13:04.040
Heck yea! Sure! Ricon style baby!

00:13:04.200 --> 00:13:05.260
"I am so sorry."

00:13:05.260 --> 00:13:10.280
[Silence]

00:13:10.320 --> 00:13:12.760
Well, it's time to end that episode there.

00:13:12.760 --> 00:13:17.620
Thank you guys so much for all the lovely support and epic-ness

00:13:18.280 --> 00:13:19.880
And creativity.

00:13:19.880 --> 00:13:27.420
Smash like, subscribe, bro fist at 100 million, bro fist to God, and I'll see you guys next time! BYE!

00:13:27.540 --> 00:13:28.700
Tuber simulator

00:13:28.700 --> 00:13:34.340
It's now so relevant that it's got a brand new mini game Craniac!

00:13:34.800 --> 00:13:40.680
Drop the crane and get fresh items only available in the washing machine like game !

00:13:40.680 --> 00:13:41.780
And you say there's more?

00:13:41.780 --> 00:13:42.680
Of course there is!

00:13:42.920 --> 00:13:49.400
New knowledge perks, new quests, and new pixalinks and legs... guys.

00:13:50.780 --> 00:13:51.980
Legs.

00:13:51.980 --> 00:13:55.860
[Music]